They are the people with whom we can talk on the phone for hours and have been doing so for decades ... Even moving house is fun with them, they are incredibly talented at making everything more beautiful. We like to give each other the most important thing we have in life, our time, with all our hearts. They understand what occupies and moves us, and they always have free access to our hearts and minds. We share life's happy moments and challenges with them: Our friends.

Friendship facts

Next to family, friendships are the most important thing in the lives of Germans. According to a survey by the SINUS Institute and YouGov, we have an average of 3.7 close friends, and over 66% have a best friend. What does true friendship mean to those surveyed? Being there for each other, answered 70 percent, and for 71 percent honesty is an indispensable basis. And what about shared values and convictions? Interestingly, only 41% consider this to be a prerequisite for a good friendship. Apparently, we can be more tolerant towards friends or are more open to different opinions.

When do you actually become friends? According to studies by Jeffrey Hall, it takes 40 to 60 hours in the six weeks after the first meeting for a new acquaintance to become a casual friendship. A good or best friendship develops after 120 to 160 hours together, within the first three weeks.

How friendships grow

We form our first friendships from the age of three. Even in kindergarten, we intuitively know how important friends are to us and choose our favorite playmates. As young children are still very self-centered and not yet able to put their own needs aside, it can happen that two people are only "friends" for an afternoon. Friendships in childhood are often alliances of convenience, for example to have a play partner. The older we get, the more important conversation becomes for us - and friendships deepen as a result. By puberty at the latest, the best friend plays a central role, especially for girls. She learns all the secrets and is of the utmost importance for understanding the world and personal development. Boys usually also have a good friend, but if he is not available, they often have no problem meeting up with others. As psychologists have discovered, these differences do not change in adulthood, men and women have different friendships. A study of more than 8,800 test subjects showed that women place more value on trust, loyalty, self-disclosure and togetherness than men. Men often have a single close friend and are more likely to have acquaintances. For women, good friends play an important role, they talk about weaknesses and fears, they show solidarity and are more willing to open up. In many male friendships, the focus is on factual issues such as work-related matters, while they sometimes prefer to keep personal matters to themselves and discuss them with their partner.

Friendship today

The importance of friendship has grown. In this day and age, partnerships and jobs change more frequently and having a family is no longer a matter of course. Friends usually fade into the background when starting a family, but when this doesn't happen, friendships are cultivated all the more intensively. For around ten percent of 18- to 55-year-olds in Germany, friendships are at the center of their lives, where the sense of responsibility towards friends is particularly strong and people feel obliged to each other.

Friendships make you happier - and healthier

Good social relationships not only make people happier, but also physically healthier and increase life expectancy. A study of more than 300,000 people at Brigham Young University in Utah documented their state of health over eight years and came to the conclusion that a lack of social ties had just as harmful an effect as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Friendships strengthen the immune system, improve wound healing and reduce the risk of cardiovascular disease and depression. They alleviate acute stress and long-term strain. In experiments, people estimate the gradient of a hill to be less if a friend is standing next to them! The more intense the friendship, the stronger the effect. Scientists were able to measure that people in the company of friends release fewer stress hormones in exam situations. Obviously, friends give you a different perspective on life; with them by your side, problems become less threatening. However, the feeling of not being alone in the world doesn't just help people cope with everyday life in difficult times.

Friendships need nurturing

Rituals are important for friendships, for example regular phone calls or meetings. In some phases of life, however, it is no longer quite so easy to maintain friendships, whether because of a move to another city, during periods of professional stress, illness or when children are born. Sometimes life changes or life goals change, which can also affect a friendship. A clear discussion is then helpful and important for both parties. In the same way, we are all happy when we say thank you for a great friendship!

Well placed with yourself too

You should always be friendly towards your own body. This includes looking after your own well-being every day. With small pleasures, brief moments of relaxation and a healthy attitude to life.